Friday, December 3, 2010

Sternest Meanings

Here's some Flarf. Source material here.

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How's it going, you terrible bitter loner?

I hate the show "What Not to Wear"
It's basically asyllabic.

Or monosyllabic, you loyal snob.

My misspellings are helping the anagrams,
but sheepish gremlins pig mentally.
I fed them nachos after midnight.

The high-flier despises healthy semen.
Odder rottenness stinkers.

Maturity woman-hater hotheads.
Agitate appal anus. Rent sets.

I couldn't find "appal" in my dictionary.
Are you making up words to beat me?

Fouled-up, incompliant rainy day.
I'm an artistic, down-market goodbye.

You're leaving me?
The Great Satan?
Earth stagnate?
Infertile wasteland?

Do you want me to turn on the air conditioner?
White-hot, unodious, mad twit.

You pirate's moth-eaten nurturer.
You cretinoid.

I am the neater younger. I am
the swooning thuggery inebriation.

Well, it is Friday

you wasp-like, young,
eager young man. Rent sets.

Rent just cleared the bank this afternoon
you stealthy, nasty, encumbered jerk.

You obturate, weepy, toughish mutterer,
songlike practical application.

Endanger fat-witted hullaballoos
with a prenatal pistol-whip.

Palpitate to this rotten whiplash.
I am the crazed blow-out womanizer.

I feel like you're inherently sexist,
an eerily hero-like, funny elitist sexist.

That is simply nonsense. You're skirting the issue.

I may tweet about this later,
the wittiest, amoral beauty.

And you, the hypocrite's adulterate deviation.
You, the penetrative, stodgiest of sphincters.

You hoodwink the filthy in ethylene hubs.
I hear that's popular in airport bathrooms.

Dirt-cheap high treason hesitates
with you, the odorous ultra-patriot,

the cheap boobification of the heavy-hearted devil,
the off-broadway ovations.

I am an unpretty, a white-hot monkery,
a famously ethylene adoration.

I am a thrilled heat rash to retardation.

I am the tameable gunk agitator.

I am pliantly error-free blisters.

I am hot sores.

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